Mar 26
Something old, something new and something costly
Asian weddings are complicated, lavish, cost a fortune and are a nightmare to organise. Bindi Senghani visits the Asian Wedding Exhibition in London and muses over what really matters on the most important day of your life.
The Asian Wedding Exhibition 2007 was held on the 17th/18th February at the Alexandra Palace in London, a spacious Victorian setting with beautifully painted windows, and castle type paintings on the ceiling. As I entered the room with my two cousins and sister, I couldn’t help thinking that this would be such a nice venue for a wedding! I’m not even getting married and it’s as if the energy from the room left you thinking about your dream wedding day (even if it is still a good seven to eight years away!).
The doors opened at 11am and by the afternoon the Palace was heaving with visitors. The venue itself was packed with over 100 exhibitors from across the UK and Asian
subcontinent covering a range of wedding industry supplies, including fashion, beauty, catering, venues, photography displays, musicians, videos and everything else that even the most demanding extravaganza could need.
It was all a bit too overwhelming for me and would certainly not have liked to be in an impending bride’s shoes. There is so much to choose from but the thought will always remain lingering over the mind, what if someone else has the same ideas and outfit as me?
My parents got married in the 70s. When I first saw their wedding film I was shocked to see paper decorations with gold and green tinsel spread out across the half stripped walls and mandap with the leftovers used to decorate a bright yellow car. Guests were eating on the floor and the bride was forbidden to smile (apparently it is bad luck to smile on what should be the happiest day of your life!). Today the above is seen as tacky, cheap and shoddy. Would it be wrong to say that these days weddings are used to show off how much money had gone into its making?
Talking to my mother she said she never really had to worry about whether her sari would clash with dad’s suit, what coloured themes where in this seasons, who was the best-priced caterer (as the food was homemade by the family) and decide where to go on honeymoon. Nowadays, however, all these factors must run through the minds of brides and grooms at least four times a day in the build up to the big day. 
Today, weddings are about mixing tradition with modernity, religion with celebration and rituals. The contemporary Asian wedding is complicated with so much to consider. And suddenly there’s a need for a two day event which attempts to squeeze as much as possible under one roof.
Walking around the exhibition I couldn’t help comparing it to the shops in India where someone tries to persuade you to come and have a look, because shop assistants would stop us and hand us business cards, brochures or catalogues all the time. After an hour, the girls and me were in the need for a wake up call and so deliberately walked past a catering stall hoping that they would stop us. The plan worked and we sneaked in some delicious samosas and kachori.
As we continued our walk around the hall, we admired the mandaps constructed for the show. None of them compared to the one at the end of the hall: I loved its long drapes, the decorative white pearls, and its candles and flowers that gave it an air of serenity and calmness.
With three fashion shows each day, the main catwalk celebrates the largest Asian wedding fashion collections seen outside the subcontinent, with debuts from a number of promising designers. The parade of different colours and designs left me in ultimate awe. I thought I’d died and gone to heaven when gorgeous attire after gorgeous attire continued to stroll down the aisle. For my cousin on the other hand, she said she died and had gone to heaven and refused to come down when a certain male model made her queasy at the knees. I regretted wanting to finish off my food first before heading to the show, becasue this meant settling for a second best view – so here’s my top tip: arrive by the stage a good few minutes before the show starts to be able to soak in the full brilliance of the garments.
Before the place could get any more crowded we decided to call it day and headed back to the car with ice-creams in one hand and bags of promotions in the other. The ride back home gave me time to reflect. A wedding is a sacred, special day for any couple. Before attending this exhibition, I admit, I was quick to judge and criticise other weddings I had attended, saying things like: “Oh the colour of that sari does not go well with the lighting of this hall at all!” I’d eye up the decorations, the design of the mandap and the costumes and think how I would have done it better. I would block out the fact that the three days would have taken months of planning and preparation and many sleepless nights.
The days when my mother got married, when fashion was not a necessity, a photographer not a must-have and when oddly coloured tinsel was used as decoration seem to have long gone. Watching my parents wedding film, however, I am reminded that one thing hasn’t changed: The coming together of friends and family, the closeness, laughter and happiness shared are what makes the day that extra special and sacred. Source: Drdesi.com
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